ASSESSMENTS

Healthy Selfishness & Compulsive Caretaking

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Mark your calendars! My book is set to release on

Mark your calendars! My book is set to release on January 9, 2024.

A big, heartfelt thank you to Publishers Weekly! Your kind words mean the world to me. My passion for helping women in similar situations led me to not only become a psychotherapist but to write this book, and I'm grateful to share it and receive support and recognition.

Now's the perfect time to secure your copy by pre-ordering RUN LIKE HELL today.

#preorder #traumabonding #narcissisticabusehealing #booklaunch #bookreview #thankyou #publishersweekly

Did you know that domestic occurrences account for

Did you know that domestic occurrences account for the largest category of phone calls to the police in the United States?

Believe it or not, It took until the '70s to label domestic violence a crime, and then it wasn’t until '93 that it become it illegal to rape a spouse. Thank goodness for progress!

Now, courts are catching up and acknowledging coercive control as domestic violence.

Domestic violence awareness is a crucial component of creating a world where everyone can feel safe in their home. Because we all deserve to have a home that’s synonymous with safety, don’t you think? Continue to spread awareness and educate yourself by going to my website. Together, we can break the stigma of abuse and empower each other to RUN LIKE HELL from trauma bonds and domestic violence.

#narcissisticabuseawareness #domesticviolenceawareness #coercivecontrol #dvcrime #domesticviolence

From the chaos of helping him upstairs to a surpri

From the chaos of helping him upstairs to a surprise police visit, this scene from the movie is TRUE! In reality, how he managed to get home is the real-life plot twist that's more than Hollywood script material.

Stick around for the full 90 seconds to hear a little-known trivia fact related to this scene from the #WolfofWallStreet. Then go pre-order my book, RUN LIKE HELL– the book I wish I had while married to the Wolf!

#traumabonds #moviefacts #thetruestory #whatreallyhappened #hollywood #countryclub

So often my patients will ask me: “Dr Nae, why d

So often my patients will ask me: “Dr Nae, why does he do it? Why cheat, lie, harm, abuse, and control when he knows the pain it causes?”

The answer is three reasons.

First, narcissistic Pathological Lovers have an overwhelming sense of entitlement where personal needs for money, power, pleasure, and status override empathy and consideration.

This entitlement is fueled by an ingrained feeling of superiority, as if the world revolves around them. It's a toxic cocktail that perpetuates harmful actions.

The third reason just deepens the complex nature of a PL—no moral compass. His actions aren't driven by ethics, and there's a void where empathy should be.

Understanding these dynamics is the first step to breaking free. Keep going and remember you're not alone. You are empowered to recognize the signs, arm yourself with knowledge, and RUN LIKE HELL from the trauma bond PLs keep you trapped in.

#traumabonds #narcissists #narcissisticabuseawareness #pathologicallover #whydoeshedothat #toxiclove #entitlement #runlikehell

Trauma bonds distort your perception of self-worth

Trauma bonds distort your perception of self-worth and cloud your understanding of what you truly deserve. They make you accept less than you’re worthy of and convince you that being treated as an option is the norm. But it's not.

If someone isn't treating you like the priority you are, it's time to reassess.
Your time, your emotions, and your presence are valuable beyond measure.

Being treated accordingly means setting standards for how you deserve to be treated, recognizing your worth, and refusing to settle for anything less than the respect and consideration you deserve.

SAVE this post so you don’t forget it!

Educate yourself to be empowered to prioritize your worth and never be tricked into another trauma bond. Link is in my bio for all the resources you need.

#quotes #empowerment #dontsettle #runlikehell #traumabonding

Britney Spears’ book is so much more than

Britney Spears’ book is so much more than a memoir, it’s a chilling portrayal of a trauma bond between parent and child— the conservatorship saga just the tip of the iceberg.

A trauma bond’s essence lies in intermittent abuse, and in the book she shares some of the extreme gestures of kindness followed by unparalleled cruelty. And the same is true of the second component of trauma bonds— a power imbalance—represented by how the parent wields total control and abuses the trust the child inherently places in them.

I get it. We’re with you, @britneyspears 💖 This book serves as a testament to your resilience and strength. Thank God you got justice and that you got out!

For anyone who is in or has experienced a trauma bond with a parent or romantic partner, educate yourself to be empowered to have what it takes to heal and RUN LIKE HELL. 💃 💃 💃

#traumabonding #attachment #narcissisticabuse #thewomaninme #britneyspears

Don’t let Pathological Lovers ruin your holidays

Don’t let Pathological Lovers ruin your holidays!

Using these 3 tips to survive the season will help you compartmentalize difficulties, prevent yourself from being disappointed, and stabilize your emotional well-being.

The spirit of the holidays are the opposite of what narcissists are capable of: genuine connection, warmth, and sentimentality. So when they try to take you away from the wonderful, beautiful nature of the season it’s essential to have strategies ready to go when they begin to turn the tables and try making the holidays about them.

So remember these tips:
💖 Don’t defend or engage with your PL when he tries to engage with you. Instead, say “we can agree to disagree” and pocket the discussion to process later with your therapist.
💖 Manage your expectations with radical acceptance. By coming to terms with the fact that he’s going to be difficult beforehand, you prevent yourself from being disappointed when it inevitably happens.
💖 Don’t stop your self care routine. Taking care of yourself is stabilizing for your well-being, and when dealing with a narcissist, you’re going to need as much emotional stability as possible!

If you’re feeling stressed, take some deep breaths and know that you’ll get through the holiday season. Visit my website to read the narcissist survival guide, join my newsletter, pre-order my book, and access the abundance of my free resources for 24/7 support.

#holidaysurvivalguide #holidaystruggles #traumabonding #narcissisticabuse

At an initial glance, both healthy love and trauma

At an initial glance, both healthy love and trauma bonded love exhibit signs of affection, commitment, and closeness, making it difficult to discern the fundamental differences. Although they may look similar on the outside, don’t be fooled!

Healthy love is caring for your partner genuinely and the motivation to understand them. It’s having a curiosity about their behaviors, thoughts, and feelings as well as taking the time to reflect on how your behavior impacts your partner. Partners in healthy love possess the capacity to be honest, recognize and appreciate each other’s uniqueness, and feel secure enough to be vulnerable and authentic with one another.

These are qualities you won’t find in trauma bonded love. In a trauma bond, the PL’s primary focus is coercive control because it assures him all the cozy comforts of owning his lover. His needs come first, and this belief drives his conduct through intermittent abuse and a power differential. He takes away your autonomy and ability to differentiate between yourself and who he has tricked you into becoming.

If you can learn to recognize the difference between healthy love and trauma bonded love, you can hopefully avoid the pathological manipulation of PLs or help someone you love avoid entering a trauma bond relationship.

Education creates empowerment! FREE educational resources are available on my website including worksheets, meditations, assessments, and more.

#empowerment #traumabonding #healthylove #narcissisticlove #runlikehell #educateyourself

One of the primary reasons many women stay bonded

One of the primary reasons many women stay bonded to narcissistic Pathological Lovers is cognitive dissonance (CD).

When his mask starts to slip after the love-bombing stage, your internal thinking process starts comparing the two sides of his personas, trying to decide whether to leave or stay. Your PL initially behaved kind and then controlling, and you begin to see an inconsistency and have completely opposite relationship experiences with him.

So who is he: Jekyll or Hyde?

This is the internal battle of CD that paralyzes your thinking process and keeps you in a trauma bond.

If you find yourself experiencing this, go to my website to learn more about trauma bonding and how to break free. And if you haven’t done so already, make sure you pre-order my book, RUN LIKE HELL!

#traumabonding #relationshipexpert #cognitivedissonance #intermittentabuse #narcissistabuse

My experience of being married to the #WolfofWallS

My experience of being married to the #WolfofWallStreet taught me the contrast between the sweetness of love and the tragedy of remaining innocent about its power.

Within 6 months of meeting, I caved to his constant pressure and agreed to marry him and immediately have children. What followed was an 8-year toxic cycle of love, violence, threats, living in fear— a confusing and harmful relationship I later realized was a trauma bond.

If you are or have been stuck in a trauma bond, please know that I deeply empathize with you. I understand your pain, humiliation, and devastation. I get it, because I was one of those women. I know that by sharing my experience, so many women have been empowered to avoid the wolves who wear masks, hiding who they really are as narcissistic Pathological Lovers who will do anything to seduce you.

I wrote RUN LIKE HELL to demystify trauma bonds. It's the book I wish I had while married to the Wolf. Pre-order your copy of RUN LIKE HELL today to become a SURTHRIVER.

#traumabonding #traumabondrelationship #relationshipexpert #romanticlove #toxiclove #healthylove #narcissisticabuseawareness #runlikehell #preorder #womenempoweringwomen

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